You know you’re a mom of two small children, when:
- You no longer try clothes on at the store. You just buy everything and become a regular at the return counter.
- You’ve also become addicted to online shopping. Promo codes like whaaaat!
- You pray you don’t see anyone you know when you do leave the house, because you most likely look like the walking dead.
- If a restaurant does not have a drive thru window- you will not get my business. Clearly they don’t understand the time and energy it takes to unload two small children.
- Sure- you’ve always liked Target, but have formed an unconditional love for the one stop shop.
Jump Back, Cincinnati! - Remember when you set lofty goals about going to the beach this summer? Yeah, that was shattered quickly. Instead, you made a 2 hour trip to the bustling metropolitan of Cincinnati.
- If your place of business does not provide shopping carts, I will pass you by. Hey, I’m talking to you Old Navy.
- Your Saturday night will take two hours to get the kids ready to go out for ice cream. You will then spend the evening at the ice cream parlor changing diapers, looking for pacis, cleaning ice cream off the floor, and wiping sticky fingers. Gettin crunk!
- In the middle of running errands, your newborn will start wailing for food and your 18 month old will fall asleep going from place A to place B. Better luck next time, mom.
- Speaking of nap time, it was always cool- but when both kids are sleeping in the middle of the day at the same time, you’ve struck gold.
- Maybe you should clean the house, do laundry, unload the dishwasher, bathe yourself, feed yourself, or drink wine during this glorious 2 hour window….instead you fall asleep on the couch. Yolo!
- Speaking of wine…you often wonder at 9 am if it truly is 5:00 somewhere.
Victory! - Strollers are a beast. The double stroller is your friend and foe.
- You make a to-do list of necessary tasks just to feel like you accomplished something.
- Remember how easy it was to be seated at a restaurant when it was the two of you? Now, you have to get a table for 4 that is large enough for a high chair and one of those weird cradle things that holds the car seat.
- You see people hoping your family is not seated next to them at the restaurant. And then you are. Hope you like flying crayons!
- You get seriously angry at people who snag the prime parking spot before you do. Now, you must circle around the lot to either find another spot close to the door or to the cart return.
- Hey friend! Want to meet for lunch? Sure, friend with no kids…but it either has to be at 9 am or 3 pm. That nap time window is crucial.
- Child #1 is filthy from playing outside all morning. You should bathe him…but the sprinkler is just so dang convenient.
…. and then something like this last picture happens in the middle of the day… out of no where … it melts your heart, and you are beyond thankful to be a mom of two small children.